HOW CAN I make a DIFFERENCE?
Interesting conversation that I had with fellow colleagues the other day regards marriage and divorce. There seems to be a dilemna regards tying the knot. Perhaps it is the lifestyle that one is living considering the job that we do and this seems to be prevalent. There is an apprehension to the extend of a fear that the marriage will not work out. There can be many reasons or circumstances that one is caught in. Let me try to understand and analyse this. There is this subject on communication which seems to be lacking. Could one of the reasons be the co-habitating of a couple before they get married? Statistics have proven that a higher percentage of couples who had lived together before getting married had ended in divorce. Somehow this false sense of the need to try it out by living together first so that they can get to know each others habits, etc., proved to be futile. It is this commitment factor that is also an issue in a relationship. This living together does not have it's commitment in that each can choose to or decide to go their seperate ways but when it comes to marriage, it is totally different. Next is the infidelity of a spouse especialy the male (not excluding female totally). There is a need to understand this from a different perspective. Let me speak on the subject of contraceptives. Once again there is a false sense of preventing conception that one can indulge in sex with the misconceived notion that pregnancy would not happen. Therefore this gives rise to flirting or fooling around with another party - having an affair. Take another look at whether one takes to heart 'the gift of life' through the instrument that allows us to procreate. Is it not true that the primary purpose of sex is to procreate? But our minds have been distorted and perverted because of the media through movies that does not portray the right values AND encouraging the use of contraceptives to prevent the spread of HIV, etc., without taking a deeper look at the consequences of this. If condom does prevent the spread of sexual diseases then why is there an epidemic? Finally, no man or woman had brought a man and a woman together to bind them in marriage. Yes, there are ministers, justice of peace, etc., who are given the authority (and/or reponsibility) to consumate a marriage between a man (husband) and a woman (wife) but that is all that they do. Marriage is and had been from the very beginning sacred and had been instituted by a Higher Divine Being. Why? Because life is a gift from above. We continue to do His Will. He 'Created' and we continue to pro-create. Therefore husband and wife through their love give brith to new life - a gift.
YOU AND I ARE A GIFT.
On the subject above, couples should have a Mission Statement as well and have the vows that were exchanged when their marriage was consumated written in Bold and framed. It should be visible that one can see it everyday. A reminder that it was a choice that they had made and solemnly swore without anyone coercing them to do so. Another area is especially true and that is the need to see and realise that they are bonded (not in the literal sense of being completely tied to one another that it becomes stifling and overbearing) together for a reason and a purpose that is not only for and of themselves but towards enriching their lives with new life and contributing to the better good of humanity. For those who believe, not only of my faith but of other religion who are of goodwill, can make a difference in this area to show that it is possible to achieve this ideal of a loving relationship even with the pains and struggles of everyday living. The cohesiveness and integrity of a family unit is truly the FOUNDATION STONE (the pillar) of a society, a country and the world. I missed out a point on contraceptives. I mentioned that there is this misconceived notion that contraception does prevent birth or the spread of sexual diseases. Yes, one might think that pregnancy does not occur by using contraceptives but what if it happens? Perhaps if we look into the passion of the act itself that one seeks pleasure from. In the midst of this 'lust' does it not occur that the putting aside of the usage of contraceptives is of a high probability. Next, even with the usage there are also possibilities of it being wrongly used or that there are leakages. Then what? The dilemna of keeping or aborting!!! Abortion is killing but then, does one have this conscience or had it been hardened up through media and wrong values and morals. Is it not true that abortion breeds irresponsibilty in that the easy way out is taken? On the other side of keeping the child which is very noble and should be the right thing to do, would it not become a burden to those responsible? If they choose to keep the child then the question of whether proper nurturing and love will be given, afterall at the back of their minds they had not planned nor wanted a child. Even though the infant is not able to speak or talk, the child is able to sense the care and love or lack of it that is shown. Without second guesses, what kind of a child will he or she grow up to be? Is it not sad that one has a lack of choices when one chooses to look selfishly at their own 'supposed' needs and pleasures without realising the consequences?
WHAT CAN YOU AND I DO to MAKE a DIFFERENCE?
What then is the right thing to do? Love the mother and the child. If the means and level of maturity to keep the child is difficult and not the best of reasons, then there are those who are very prepared and of good standing to take care of the new born - a gift from you to them. Precious is a child - the gift of life not only from flesh and blood but from a Divine Being who have in the beginning given us this gift of EACH ONE of US.
As I continue .........
...that I may add more .....
....and more.....
....and more.....
.....towards my Final End, I'll bid you farewell.
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